I needed to get out of my own way and chill on the over-parenting.

It took me a looong time to figure out that I am never too old to grow up.  I'm still learning how to do that and sometimes it is most annoying.

I recently tried to prevent one of my children from doing something without me
and realized that, that is exactly what she needed to do.  I tried to defy my instinct to protect and serve (just like the police) but realized that I was getting in the way and not letting her have her own experiences. She was clearly old enough.  My girlfriends made faces at my decision.  My husband shrugged it off.  That's when the light bulb went off.  I had to grow up and let her grow up.  Why didn't somebody tell me?  Its right up there with admitting you are wrong or having a colonoscopy.  You have to do it if you want to survive.  I guess I am going to have to get rid of the  surveillance camera I have on her car now.  sigh.