The three day, anxiety filled flotilla, known as the Carnival Splendor, has permanently ended our family discussions of going on a cruise. Yahoo!

I have never been a fan of cruises and as a result have never taken one in my life. The yearly effusive suggestions of "Let's take the entire family on cruise vacation" have done nothing but get my panties in a twist. There are too many "don't like" issues for me.

Don't like enclosed spaces.
Don't like frozen food.
Don't like buffet lines with frozen food.
Don't like crowds.
Don't like casinos.
Don't like shitty showers.
Don't like not being able to get off the boat when I want to.

Catch my drift? And speaking of drift, thankfully now I don't have to list all of my "don't-likes" and sound like a phobic, anxiety filled vacationer. I no longer have to cry my woes of major schpilkies. All I have to say are the words...Carnival Splendor.

Air dropped spam deliveries notwithstanding, this quote from surviving C.S. passenger Karyn van Latum, describing her first class room at night, without electricity, tells it all.

"...It was like a coffin, it was so dark."

Moving on...how about that safari expedition? Who said Grammy would never shower in a tent?