I work a mean machine.

Spring is here and it's time for a new outdoor grill. This will be my 4th one in twenty years. My mother can't believe that I've gone through so many grills but I use my grill all the time, year round, in all types of weather.

"You are always buying appliances" she said.  And in that wonderfully gentle mother-way she added, "You know honey, they're supposed to last ten years or more."

Not in my house. I beat the shit out of my appliances. I suck the life out them like it was my job. And while we're on it, I've had four washer and dryers, too. I'm on my second set of front loaders and I just replaced the motor drum last month. When the repair man came to fix it, he asked me how many loads I do in a day.

"On a good day 6-8, on a light day 2-3". I confessed.

He looked at me like I was nuts. No surprise there.

"No wonder you blow through your warranties. The 10 year lifetime of these machines are based on one load a day." he advised.

And I remembered that he told me the same thing when he repaired my 3rd dishwasher last year. I use that at least twice a day. I mean, if you're trying to be "green" and not use paper goods, what are your alternatives?

"Most people don't put their pots and pans in the dishwasher, honey" my mother offered. Not me. I like hard work but I'm not a fan of washing dishes. I discovered early on, with three small children and a dog running around the house, that my dishwasher does it way better and doesn't bitch and moan while it's doing it.

And coffee machines? I can't even count how many I've had.

I'm getting reflective here and thinking that I may be a princess, and a ho. Oops...hate when that happens.